As most of us have probably figured out by now, there are no guarantees in life. No matter how much we may desire for things to stay the same, change is inevitable. Living with the uncertainty of life on a day-to-day basis is a challenge for many of us.
What is not so obvious is the treasure that can be mined or discovered within this mountain of stress, doubt, frustration, and fear.
Meeting this challenge head-on brings so many rewards and benefits that are not visible without taking the plunge into the unknown.
“I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy, and creativity to name a few.”
Living With The Uncertainty — Conditioned to Fail
The majority of people on the planet have been conditioned to fail. When we land here and open our eyes, we have no idea of what we are in for. Dependent on circumstances, we may thrive in our early years and be well-prepared for adulthood. Unfortunately, this is not the case for the majority of us. Our parents did not receive a manual on how to prepare us for life when we were born.
Friends, family, the educational system, government interventions, religion, and other outside factors also have done their best to beat us down into conforming with the “way things are”. A few of us were able to bypass some of this and emerge relatively unfazed by this conditioning and then were able to move forward in life with confidence and determination.
But those of us who were not so fortunate were left with a mighty challenge on our hands, especially if it was our intention to succeed and make a difference in our lives and in the lives of others. Many times we were not even aware of our predicament until we had some “aha” moment that turned on the lights.
One thing I desire to make perfectly clear right now is that none of this is our fault, but it most certainly is our responsibility. Without owning up to where things stand, we have zero chance of making any significant changes in the direction we wish to go.
So just because we have been programmed to fail by many well-meaning, as well as not-so-well-meaning, folks and organizations throughout our lives, we now have the opportunity to change things up a bit. And the interesting thing about this is that in order to do this, we must embrace and live with the uncertainty which we most earnestly resist.
No Need to Freak Out 
When we eventually jump in and deal with the uncertainty without resisting or running away, we discover that everything is okay. Actually, uncertainty about how things play out in different areas of our lives is what keeps things interesting and adds some spice to our journey.
The key here is that we do not need to have all the answers, and know exactly how to do this or that to meet any challenge or situation confronting us. When we allow things to be, we create the space for the answers to arrive. We do not have the energy of our resistance to keep our solutions and answers away. We stop fighting ourselves and others, and life begins to flow.
When we are in this state of mind and presence, we are able to stay focused on what is in front of ourselves to handle in the moment. Answers to our requests arrive as need be and not before. So many times in the past when we did not get an answer (we really did but did not recognize it for what it was), it was because of the wall of resistance that we constructed to keep it from us.
Uncertainty is our friend. There is no need to panic and freak out about how we are going to handle any problem or challenge. Even in extreme circumstances, we can only do our best given our current situation. When we do our best at all times, we never have any regrets about giving up or seeing things as hopeless.
Living With The Uncertainty — There is Always a Solution
With the proper mindset, we know that there is always a solution no matter what are problems happen to be. Sometimes that solution is to just surrender and allow things to be as they are. We stop fighting our circumstances and allow things to play out.
When we are in this state of mind we are open to intuitive insights, which will guide us along the way as long as we are listening, and not getting caught up in the current drama. It is what it is, and we only can do our best by trusting our inner self to provide the way.
In business, for example, we are anxious at times to make things work, and we get in our own way. When we are not patient, we jump in and try to make things happen, instead of letting things happen. It’s the difference between being in or out of the flow of life.
Solutions are always there and will appear in the right way and at the right time. We are the only ones that can stop them from arriving by our fears and doubts.
By staying focused only on our desired results and outcomes, we put ourselves way ahead of the field in any area of endeavor which we are pursuing. We see the light at the end of the tunnel and do not get caught up with the day-to-day details which will naturally be taken care of.
In other words, we allow the solutions to appear at their own designated time. We don’t give up just before we were going to arrive at our destination, because we know we will arrive. Uncertainty can be a trap for us if we do not befriend it.
Ironically, it is this uncertainty that powers us through in order to discover what we need to know to accomplish our goals and objectives. When we learn that uncertainty is our friend, life becomes a much more enjoyable journey.
A Whole New Ballgame
When we accept our uncertainty, we can then surrender to our present circumstances. We have now positioned ourselves in a way where we cannot fail. Whatever happens, is for the best. We see things differently and experience the joy and excitement of the moment. Existence takes on a new way of Being. We are happy to be alive.
This becomes a whole new ballgame where we are not playing to win or lose, but just to enjoy the game. We are able to win or lose with the same level of enthusiasm for life. It’s living that matters, and we allow all the good stuff to just fall into place.
None of this is possible when we are so caught up with the stray distractions and dramas of life, and give them unnecessary meaning. Instead of dealing with our problems and challenges, we freak out about them, and in some cases make things worse. In any event, we are not handling things productively.
Let’s make a commitment to let go and choose to enjoy the challenges of life, and the uncertainty that life brings. Life is too short to freak out about all of this. When we open up a bit and allow this to occur, we discover an interesting fact. The uncertainty we spent so much time resisting has actually provided us with the Certainty we were seeking. Our outcome has become certain, because of the adventure which our uncertainty has provided.
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Your article caught my attention. It hit home for me because I am a control freak and I get panic attacks when thing do got go accordingly to my plan. I do go see my therapist once a week and we are working on that, it helps with the panic attack tremendously.
I know it deep in my heart that failure is a part of everyone’s life and I will progress from it. However, embracing failures have always been difficult for me. I often wonder on how many people can accept it better than me.
You are absolutely right that there is always a solution to every problem. I am trying to grasp the concept that you mentioned on letting things happened. That goes against every grain in me, I am a go getter. That is something for me to think about.
Thanks for the article, I gotta go back and think this over. Cheers!
Thanks so much for your comments. Let the info settle in a bit and you will receive a few insights. Letting things happen does not mean you are not advancing toward your goals, but you have just let go of having to have things turn out in a certain way.
Once you have your goal or objective defined and visualized it is a done deal. It is going to happen. We just are not sure exactly how.
All the best in your current and future endeavors. You can still be a go-getter but just enjoy the journey along the way. Stay present and observe when things come up. Just being aware will lessen the resistance.
I love this, your statement that we are conditioned to fail. We’re conditioned to fall in line, and believe that “truth,” in this case “the way things are” comes from authority, and that compliance to such a false truth is rewarded by the government-funded educational system while noncompliance is punished and ridiculed. Then, those of us who know the real truth and speak the real truth are ridiculed by most, stating we just can’t “face the fact” about the way things are. If there’s one thing I learned this past year, it’s slowly but progressively new strategies on breaking down such this negative mental block, and that’s all it is; a negative mental block.
So true Todd. Thanks for your insights on this. None of this is easy but it is so very rewarding and life enhancing. All the Best in all your Endeavors.
Our mindset can be a major positive or can lead us in the wrong direction depending on how we deal with certain circumstances. I totally get where you are coming from and letting go is a good thing to do, but not necessarily an easy thing for everyone to do.
But it isn’t healthy to live like that. I am glad you are bringing up the subject and I am also hoping it can help others who are also feeling like that.
thanks
John
Thanks John for your comments. So very true about not being easy. But just the awareness itself is leading you in the right direction so that you can make a “conscious” choice instead of reacting out of fear. All the Best to You.
Hi Joseph,
Thanks a lot for this article. It is quite eye opening and challenging as well. I have myself for so long battled with uncertainty and fear of the unknown until I’m tired of it. I feel like plunging into the darkness and by faith make it through the forest of fear of the unknown. I know I have the will and the strength to do so. I only need to take the first step. Your words are quite powerful and inspirational. Especially that I do not have to have all the answers NOW.
Still, whenever I share such strategy to my close people, they fear for me, too. This shows me like it is not yet time. How do you advise to get out of this dilemma?
Boniface from Androidbix
Thanks so much for your comments. Check out my post on the Perfec Time:
https://theun-retiredentrepreneur.com/when-undecided-what-is-the-perfect-time
Don’t expect your friends to support you because they have the same fears and don’t want to advance either. Unfortunately, some of them would be jealous or envious if you did make a move. Trust yourself and your intuitive insights. You will “know” when the time is right and then you will be able to consciously say yes or no to that knowingness. All the very Best to You.
These days things seem to be more uncertain than they ever have been since I have been around in this world. This can be a bit disconcerting unless you are prepared to deal with these uncertainties. I like the approach that you are advocating since this is effective based on my own experience…
I have been in organizations where you, for the most part, do not have to worry about getting terminated. I spent 25 years in the US military and secured a pension that started at the age of 42. While doing so and later as I went into private business and my own businesses, I have continued to pay into Social Security…
So I did manage to lock in some financial security that many these days will not have the chance to do.
Nonetheless, at the age I am now, there are still more things I want to do that cost money, so I am not in a position to retire and play golf or go fishing full time (nor would I want to). The employment picture is such that a normal job is no longer realistic at my age, and truthfully I do not want to work for anyone.
In spite of all the uncertainty out there, the internet and the shift to more online jobs and work at home jobs mean that anyone can build a business and then do some of the things I did years ago (invest a portion of their income for the later years when they are old like me)…
It is the mindset and taking stock of the current status of work and opportunities that will allow you to stay calm and build your own empire. This will mean that you can better weather whatever may come and still not be stressed out. It allows you freedom from that when you build a business that you control and own.
Good post on living with the uncertainty that is all around us these days, and I think it will plant a seed in readers’ mind to get started on building their own business, life, and future using the tools that are widely available and the internet or some other type of business.
Thanks so much Dave for sharing your background and insights. It’s so important to enjoy each day and do the best we can with what we have. With enough determination anything is possible. All the Best to You.
Change is the only thing permanent in the universe. But it is just natural to feel intimidated on changes that are happening in our lives. However, that intimidation should not control the outcome. One should make sure to get up when downed or to get back on our drawing board if everything seems to be falling. Face uncertainties with grace and never get swallowed by it.
Thanks for your wonderful comments and insights. Embrace change and never give up. All the Best.
This is insightful. We all need to realize that these matters are important. Sometimes we need to assess what we’re becoming and where to head for change. I strongly agree on this but then we should also realize that we need to shrug off uncertainties, let it go because we should always go on with life.
My take on this is to be free sprited. We can’t be sitting on something that may not mean anything at all. It can hinder our relationship, our progress, our career. I’m not saying we shouldn’t be careful with decisions but at least try different path or option.
Thank you for sharing this. This is good for self actualization and discovery. Keep posting more of this so we can evaluate ourselves from time to time.
I appreciate your comments. Being free-spirited is exactly what this is all about. Let go of the resistance, trust yourself, and enjoy the journey. All the Best.
What a great post. It does hit close to home and I would say for the most of us. I liked how you talked about just letting things go, what is going to happen is what you make happen for yourself. I have a saying that I use and go by: “It is not what you are destined to be, it is what you choose to become”. I want to thank you for sharing.
I appreciate your comments George. Much appreciated. Yes we always have the choice to determine our destiny.
In this life we must fight step out in faith and go after what are goals are dreams it may not be easy because of the challenges we face at times but I believe that if we pray and place our focus on God and reach out to Him to help us in the midst of what we are going through will help us to achieve our goals but as long as we keep moving and don’t give up or give in.
I agree Norman. We must always do our Best and never give up.
I agree totally it’s only when we get out of our own way that things work themselves out, my aha moment was stressing driving a dump truck for the 1st time professionally I tossed all the night before but once in the truck took a deep breathe started her up and let my training take over.
Thanks for your thoughts, Jacob. I can remember as a kid always telling my mom, “not to worry about this or that”, and then a few years later when confronted with real-life choices constantly worried. But once I learned to let go and just jump in, things worked themselves out.