Creating Trust In A Relationship

Creating trust in a relationship requires a willingness from both parties. This involves a degree of vulnerability.

Quite often we prefer shortcuts that don’t get to the core of how we have trained each other to interact. Accountability is vital in order to create and sustain that trust.

Creating Trust in a Relationship — Willingness to Shift

“Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.”

— Stephen Covey —

Instead of applying a few band-aids here and there, let’s get to the essence of what it takes to improve any relationship. This can get a bit uncomfortable so resistance can be high initially.

All we are after is the truth, and each person is responsible for their own version of it. This means both must be willing and vulnerable enough to accept their misperceptions.

I think I mentioned this in a previous article, but it is worth re-mentioning. A friend of mine many years ago after his second divorce told me, “Joe, there are three (3) sides to every story; his, hers, and the truth.”

That pretty much sums it up. Absolute honesty is required to build trust and enable our relationships to evolve in a positive direction.

So, when both parties are willing to shift their focus from “it’s all about, me, me, me…” to a “shared purpose” of cooperation and kindness, we have the beginnings of creating trust in a relationship. It all begins with the willingness to take responsibility for our part in any relationship.

Understanding that fear and uncertainty will be present allows us to prepare ahead of time for the resistance. When experienced on a conscious level we begin to understand it’s comprised of thoughts and feelings that are NOT us.

We become the “observer” instead of feeling like the victim. Being a victim is only a distraction from the truth and merely delays our progress.

Creating Trust in a Relationship — One Small Step at a Time

“Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters.”

— Albert Einstein —

Once we envision the type of result we desire, it’s time for action. With clarity of purpose, we have more willingness to break the inertia and take that first step in the direction of a meaningful relationship based on trust and unconditional love.

Being true to ourselves is much more than a cliche. It contains the essence of trusting ourselves enough to let go and do our part in creating a mutually beneficial relationship.

A Few Insights into Meaningful, Trustful Relationships

“I do not know what I may appear to the world, but to myself I seem to have been only like a boy playing on the seashore, and diverting myself in now and then finding a smoother pebble or a prettier shell than ordinary, whilst the great ocean of truth lay all undiscovered before me.”

— Isaac Newton —

• Give it Time — there’s no need to rush. Trust is based on mutual respect for ourselves and others. Be compassionate. Even though fear and uncertainty are an illusion in the greater scheme of things, it is very real to us and based on our current paradigm quite uncomfortable.
• Each Small Step is Essential — no matter how small the step it is needed to get us to the next step on our journey
• Invisible Progress — even though we don’t see it initially progress is being made under the surface where all past conditioning and programming exist. Stay the course. It’s similar to planting a seed and having the patience for it to sprout without digging it up constantly.
• Honesty is Essential — this is the foundation of trust. It’s more difficult to clean up the mess from a lack of honesty than to deal with an uncomfortable situation upfront.
• Reliability — be true to our commitments at all times.
• Responsive to Requests — be thoughtful about responding to the needs of others in a timely matter whether or not we decide to choose to assist. Showing kindness and respect at all times creates an atmosphere of caring and trust.
• Patience — trust can take time to build as we develop a relationship. Consistency and persistence are needed to create this valuable asset.
• Transparency — secrets don’t work when establishing trust in a relationship.
• Integrity — this is an essential ingredient in building trust and a person who upholds personal values earns the respect of others.
• Empathy — when we care about the feelings of others we are positioned to earn their respect as well as being willing to acknowledge our own mistakes.

Creating Trust in a Relationship — Unconditional Love

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”

— Martin Luther King, Jr. —

In creating trust in a relationship there is no better way than by expressing unconditional love. Its power and grace are quite evident in any harmonious relationship based on trust.

There are no limits or conditions to unconditional love. We give and automatically receive an abundance of energy with no expectations.

We realize that giving and receiving are the same as they occur simultaneously on an energetic level. This is not to be figured out but experienced.

Circumstances and events do not affect unconditional love. Acceptance of “what is” is what fuels this type of love.

It all begins with loving ourselves enough to be able to extend out to others without fear of rejection. With this type of vulnerability creating trust in a relationship becomes a natural occurrence.

When we experience unconditional love we are willing to communicate with others in meaningful ways even when it is uncomfortable to do so. Love overcomes all negativity.

Even when we are emotionally tied up in knots, or as I like to refer as being in an “emotional straitjacket”, love will break those bonds. No need to fight the resistance.

We just need to let go of our focus on the negativity and fear of what may occur and be grateful for the present moment and the love that exists right now. Our power exists this very moment and when our attention is there, we are empowered to trust ourselves enough to move forward positively.

Although creating trust in a relationship is not easy at first, especially if we are caught up in long-term patterns that are fear-based, it is possible to break free one small step at a time. Let’s use our courage and determination to take that step.

In Peace & Love within the Light,

Joseph William

P.S. Let’s Trust ourselves enough to Share our unique Talents and Abilities so that others can benefit from them. CLICK HERE for All of the Details.